Reflection

It was a year ago this time that Emily and I spent 8 days in the hospital. She was recovering from RSV and undergoing numerous tests to determine the reason for her lack of weight gain. Failure to thrive, such an ugly term for such a beautiful baby. I remember being in the hospital room, my heart so heavy, it was probably the most trying time this family has gone thru. Justin was struggling with his back injury. We had no income. We didn't know how much longer we could keep our house, car, etc. Insurance was about to run out. And then our baby got sick, struggling to breath because of the ridiculous amounts of mucus in her body. A year ago I lay on a hospital "couch", barely able to sleep, watching the monitors, and making sure all the tubes were in the right places. I was torn between wanting to be home with my three other babies who were also sick with a nasty cough and being with Emily, trying to feed her, hold her, and calm her thru the probes and pokes. A year ago I learned how to insert a feeding tube into my little girl's nose, so scared of what I might do wrong. A year ago "Happy New Year" meant nothing.

Justin's mom made this wonderful print for us for Christmas, "The Lord will Provide", He has always taken care of us thru the years thru various other dark times, but we have kept Him particularly busy this year. He provided us with an excellent hospital, doctors, and therapists. He provided us with insurance, money and food when we thought we were out. He provided Justin with a job and a settlement to get us back on our feet. He provided a great surgeon who would not give up on a stubborn feeding tube. He provided a Godly kindergarten teacher, a new car, vacations with family, fun birthday parties. And most encouraging, He provided good news of a body working correctly. He has continued to give us all good health, a warm house, an income, and most importantly each other and our family. Our family has stepped above and beyond this last year to help us in every way possible. Thank you and thank you all for your prayers, it is a good thing God does not get tired of hearing from us. This year "Happy New Year" holds a little more hope, a little more joy, and a reassurance that He will provide!!